One of my best friends is one of the most likable people I know. Everyone loves him. He’s a good dad, a good husband, a good friend — you get it. He goes above and beyond to put other people first and make anyone he meets feel special along the way.
Something he loves to do is send unsolicited messages on social media to let people know he’s excited for them. He doesn’t just click “like”, he actually takes the time to craft a thoughtful message and congratulate someone on their big moment.
Recently he told me that he’d seen a post from a guy he knew on facebook about a new job. That guy had been his best friend his entire freshman year of college. They’d done everything together. They went to class, partied, and hung out nonstop. So, when my buddy saw him being successful he wanted to send him a congratulatory message.
He wrote a private message to say that he was really happy to see his success, always knew he’d turn his passion into a career, and was really excited to watch his progress. He put a lot of thought into it. (Knowing my friend he probably spent longer on it than he should have. But that’s what makes him a great guy.) Then, he fired it off and went back to his day.
Later that afternoon he heard a ping and saw that he’d gotten a response. His old college friend responded:
“Thanks so much, I really appreciate! But, by the way…how do we know each other?”
When he told me that story I lost my mind. I laughed for five minutes straight. (Add storytelling to the list of things he’s great at.)
Here was my friend just trying to be nice and turned out this guy, whom he had spent many important moments with during college, didn’t even remember him.
He sent back “We went to college together! Keep crushing it!” then removed him as a friend.
That story made me laugh, but it also made me sad. Not only because the relationships in our life can be fleeting, but also that we’ve chosen to shrink those friendships down to lines on a screen. Everyone we meet gets added to our friends list, without a second thought, and they all get the same amount of space on the screen. The stranger you met at college orientation gets the same amount of space that your co-worker or best man gets, and before long it’s hard to distinguish between who matters and who doesn’t. When everything is the same, nothing is special.
Yet another reason to delete your social media and never look back.
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About Mark Toland
Mark Toland is an award-winning mind reader and two-time TEDx Speaker. His mind blowing skills have been featured on NBC, ABC, FOX, CBS, NPR, WGN, Sirius XM, and more. Mark’s blog is a behind-the-scenes look at the life of a professional entertainer, full of creative thoughts for creative people. Sign up below so you’ll never miss a post.