The floor creaked under my feet as I walked across the empty room.
Moments before an audience had risen with thunderous applause, but for what reason?
Papers, pencils, rubber bands, and paper clips made their way back into my messenger bag. The satchel was all I needed for my show and my filmmaking hobby. There was space left over for other things but I didn't have anything else with me.
For once, I had all I needed.
"Please don't tell anyone what this says," I told her before leaving the stage.
My finale was meant to leave the audience with a mystery instead of an answer. A private message enjoyed by one person, while everyone else enjoyed her enjoyment.
Instead, she revealed all. Overcome with emotion, she broke down and told the audience what she was feeling. A strong moment that was met with laughter and applause, but not the moment I desired.
I stood backstage fuming.
Why hadn't she listened to me? She was destroying the moment I had worked hard to create. She was ruining the ending. She was erasing the mystery.
But seconds later, I stopped worrying about it. I was offstage now and there wasn't anything I could do. It wasn't up to me.
If she wanted to read my message out loud, then so be it. If she wanted to cry, then go right ahead. In that moment, I realized I could only give her a suggestion but, in the end, it wasn't my choice.
And I stood in the wings, learning to let go.
It's never come easily to me - learning to let go, I mean. But now I understand.
I took one last look at the room and smiled to myself. Something magical had happened in here tonight. Yes, this was a gymnasium by day but tonight I had transformed it into a theater. I had really connected with people. I had been more than just an entertainer. I was becoming an artist.
But did they get what I was trying to say? Did they truly understand the real meaning of the show?
I don't know. It's not up to me. It's out of my control.
I flipped off the lights and whistled softly to myself as I walked to my car. I wasn't even thinking about the show anymore. I had already let it go.